As in real life, multiple cases of sexual harassment occur everyday online. The contact is usually innocent enough at first—you meet in a chat room or newsgroup or other online venue and exchange a few comments, perhaps even exchange email addresses. Then things turn sour. Words turn into advances and things become uncomfortable for the targeted party, perhaps even dangerous. What do you do to make it stop?

            As with about half of people, Internet users are generally trustworthy people, much like yourself. After all, they were doing the same thing you were doing when you met. Most are not predators or stalkers out to victimize or bully other online users. But like that occasional loose nut you strike up a conversation with at work or in the coffee shop, you’ll have a web user now and again that hangs around like a bad cold and just gets worse from there. How do you avoid getting in such situations in the first place?

            When speaking with others online, it is always a good idea to check out the information given to you, especially when you’re considering taking the talks to the next level, by which I mean establish a greater friendship after a period of acquaintanceship. Initial information exchanged should be able to be checked out and you should be able to tell if this guy/gal is right up front in some cases. For example, the domain name associated with the email address should be verifiable, like Sue@Popularcompanyname.com. It’s hard to send information or receive it via email that isn’t actually part of the company, so a popular company email is certainly reassuring. Of course, just because the new friend has a Gmail or Yahoo account, it doesn’t necessarily spell out trouble. We’re just tackling little elements one at a time here, okay?

            Just because you’re given the home address or phone number of another web user, this shouldn’t necessarily signal an automatic release of trust. If phone contact is to be made, try to make that first contact happen at work where you have the added advantage of having to go through a switchboard operator or secretary to re-confirm that indeed it is the person’s legitimate workplace.

            Check out the entire header on any email received by this newfound friend. It can really be encrypted with information that will give you more confidence about making contact with this individual. The header is usually lengthy with a lot of code that looks like nonsense on the surface, but if you can weed through it, you may find some interesting things about your sender. The biggest item you want to pay attention to is the senders IP address. Don’t pay attention to the portion that shows your own email address, then remove your own IP address from the equation (go to whatsmyip.org to get your IP address immediately for help on this). After you deduct your IP address and your incoming information and your email address, the sender’s email address and IP should be the main parts leftover. If there is much more than this, this shows extensive levels of forwarding, meaning that the email might actually have been hijacked from its source and you may be talking to someone who is proclaiming to be someone entirely different. Paranoid? Perhaps. But do you really want to take the chance that Bob from a major company that you’re meeting from coffee is actually John owner of some scam biz he runs out of his basement? These are just good rules of thumb before making initial physical contact.

            If this fails, there are other steps you can take. The first thing you need to do is take the advances seriously. By contacting WHOA.org you can find out the steps to deterring your stalker or handling him or her via a legal route. WHOA is an acronym for Working to Halt Online Abuse, an organization that works to assist adults who have been victimized by online stalkers. The second thing to do is keep a record of all correspondence from the stalker in the event that legal action has to be taken. As tempting as it is to delete those emails, don’t.

            Finally, if all efforts fail, contact local law enforcement and report your stalker. Laws are changing with the technical times in an effort to keep up with the new problems the Internet brings to the table where harassment is concerned. But they do exist, so use them.

            If you know your online harasser—and believe me, this happens more often than not—report him or her to the proper authorities after you have issued the warning that you will do so. Again, keeping track of all correspondence is key to stopping the harassment. Take steps to block messages, blog IM, report emails to your email service, etc. You may invest in an anti-spam program that will require that you approve all mail you receive.

            A word about indirect harassment. If you are not receiving harassment directly in your email or IM, but rather your stalker is posting derogatory comments pertaining to you on message boards, comments, etc., you can take legal action to prohibit further posting and have existing information removed from such sites. This is internet libel and is punishable by law.

            The bottom line is document, document, document and don’t worry for a minute that you’re taking too many precautions or being too paranoid about corresponding with those in the cyber world.

Sources:

www.WHOA.org for information regarding cyber stalking and cyber harassment.

www.whatsmyip.org for immediate information about your IP address.

The word “published” means that the article or information in a blog need only be read by one other reader to be considered published and thereby libelous if the information is incorrect. Too often, people believe that blogging occurs under a veil of anonymity with little chance of repercussions for anything written that might not be altogether accurate. At times this is correct. For example, remarking or blogging about public figures gives the writer a little more leeway where truth is concerned than with private figures. Public figures are considered to be public domain, in a sense, and therefore subject to a reasonable degree of unabashed comment. Just ask Britney Spears whose unusual antics made her blog and headline fodder for the last…wait—how long has she had this career? Anyway, even these remarks have limitations. For example, JLo and Mark Anthony recently sued the National Enquirer for linking them to a drug scandal. How and when celebrities sue seems to have a direct connection to just how malicious or personal the article is or how important they consider the content to be.

With private citizens, however, these same unwritten rules regarding unabashed comment do not apply. Malicious words posted about a fellow classmate, for example, can be considered libelous and thereby punishable under the law. Recently lawmakers have been forced to reexamine those first amendment rights that reporters and bloggers have tried to hard to employ to deflect any shots that come their way. Those folks are finding that there is less anonymity on the Internet than they may have previously believed there to be. About that classmate business, which primarily occurs on social networking sites utilized primarily by high school and college kids like MySpace, writers are finding that there are indeed limits about what they can and cannot publish. Further, a student can “borrow” libelous words from another student’s blog, and by simply reproducing those words, can be considered equally libelous.

When business blogging, it is extremely important to post factual information and avoid slandering competitor businesses. Your business reputation depends upon it. Certainly nobody wants to enter into a business agreement with someone who isn’t mature enough to maintain professional composure online.

I like to think that all Badmouth Blogging is emotional blogging. I would like to think that such mean-tempered words are posted as a knee-jerk reaction to something heard or misinterpreted. I hate to think that someone actually gave their response much thought before responding and then still chose to use vulgarities or mean-spirited accusations. It puts me in the mind of Road Rage—reacting to other impolite acts and doing things you wouldn’t normally do face-to-face just because you’re protected by your car. Someone usually gets hurt and then ultimately can face legal repercussions. The same thing can be true with Badmouth Blogging.

            How do you avoid becoming a Badmouth Blogger? Your mother used to tell you this, but it’s still true—think before you speak. Count to ten or twenty, or even log off for a while if you can’t respond appropriately to a blog, comment or other published information. Instead of “getting even” with a Badmouth Blogger, report the offending blog. Take the high road. Remember that your reputation, possibly your family’s reputation and that of your boss or own company rely upon your ability to handle your blogs and blog responses the same way in which you would handle your telephone—with courtesy and respect.  

A man accused of making unflattering comments about a former lover in a Craigslist forum made headlines today. J.P. Weichel was charged with two counts of libel. We are seeing an increasing number of charges associated with cyber infractions in the news as of late.

Cyber-libel is another catchphrase that will, most likely, hit the most Googled list by year’s end. We’ve touched on other related subjects, such as Internet cyber-stalking and cyber-bullying; cyber-libel was bound to make an appearance sooner or later. Finding and prosecuting violators, even those who often operate under the guise of anonymity, is proving to be less difficult than before thanks to technology specifically designed to track blogs, comments and board postings back to the wordsmith. Take a second to go to What’s My IP Address?, (http://whatismyipaddress.com/) and you’ll immediately be able to see the IP address of the computer you’re using. The IP address is the binary number your machine has been assigned which tracks your location, network, and other information about your computer. Of course there are many other factors involved in tracking down a cyber offender, but it just goes to show how easy it is to leave digital footprints all over the place. In Weichel’s case, Craigslist keeps extensive posting records that were accessible for review and easily able to be traced back to him. The government and corporations often employ integrated tracking devices designed to baby-sit employees and users. Throw in an occasional good old fashioned nark, and libel attorneys must be having a cyber-field day!

According to Buchanan Ingersoll & Rooney, attorneys who often take on cases of cyber slander, “Libel is generally defined as a maliciously written or printed publication which tends to blacken a person’s reputation or expose him to public hatred, contempt or ridicule, or injure him in his business or profession.” (http://library.findlaw.com/2001/Jan/1/127167.html).

 That’s a pretty good definition. The bottom line is this: There’s a huge difference between making a statement of general dissatisfaction with a company or individual’s services, but to ignite an attack on personal character or a group’s integrity is an altogether different creature. In provable cases, cyber-libel can be dealt with legally with lawsuits scoring up to thousands of dollars in retribution for the wronged party.

More and more cases of cyber-libel are being presented to the courts, and in turn, the courts are scrambling to examine existing libel laws to include protections for Internet users. Emails containing libelous information about an individual or company can be considered publishable slander and thereby able to prosecuted under existing laws against those who slander. Proven libel carries a punishment of up to 18 months in jail and/or damages. Similar punishment can be awarded to those who simply linking to the libelous sites or promote them in any way, despite the fact that they are not the author of the libelous material. 

With so many networking sites such as Facebook and MySpace, more people than not have witnessed the impact of cyber-libel. It’s getting easier to crack down on malicious offenders, but we’re not quite there yet. So, what can we do?

The government is working to modify existing libel laws to include specifics regarding cyber-libel. Companies will continue to employ integrated programming to source out offenders within their own walls and in the great beyond. As for individuals, we should use a simple rule of thumb—if you wouldn’t take out an ad in a local newspaper making such a statement against an individual and/or company, don’t state it in a comment box or on a message board. Lastly, set a responsible example for your children—they get their tolerance and behavior from you.

CREDITS:

Buchanan Ingersoll & Rooney PC http://library.findlaw.com/2001/Jan/1/127167.html

What’s My IP Address?  http://whatismyipaddress.com/

Yahoo News: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081202/ap_on_re_us/libel_online;_ylt=Aip4pJAUItaklkp4QUGnAcOs0NUE

            I don’t know how this case will end. I’ll keep following the headlines like everyone else. But what I have noticed about this case is the global attention it is receiving. In preparation for this blog, I searched “cyber-bullying” in news and found articles from sources from every major city in the U.S. as well as Canada and as far away as Australia and the UK and more. The eyes of the world are watching to see how this unprecedented case is resolved. And despite the fact that I’m not sure, myself, how it should be resolved, boy, oh boy, I hope we do it right.

As the parent of a 12-year-old girl, this whole story is especially tough to take. I have stayed up late into the night attempting to ease the heartbreak that few cruel words spoken by classmates can cause. I watch from the sidelines as my daughter prepares herself for her school day, or any day really, carefully selecting her clothes and her hairstyles, looking for a second opinion and reassurance in so many ways. I help her hang her Jonas Brothers posters over spaces where Zac Efron was only last week, and I listen to her side of the conversation as she dishes tween celebrity gossip with her friends over the course of multiple phone calls. Preteen and early teenage years are such a precious time. It’s a time when kids discover the sound of their own voices; it’s when they stomp around this earth of ours to check out their own footprints. It certainly doesn’t take much to knock their precarious worlds off course.

As most parents are, I am very aware of this. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could haul our kids around in those Snugli-paks until they were about, oh, 18? Well, I suppose that is a little impractical. Meanwhile, I’ll keep trying to undo the damages of harsh words spoken in the lunchroom. I’ll remain the almighty enforcer of the curfew that is, of course, earlier than the all the cool kids’ curfew. And even though those same cool kids all have MySpace accounts, I’ll continue to stand firm on my platform of big-fat NO. (“But how will I talk to my friends?” “With your mouth.” –And I’ve got tons more standard answers where that came from.)

This is it—the “parenting” I read about in handbook after handbook when this kid was still napping twice a day. Who knew some of the evils we were to protect them from would come in the form of an innocent-looking avatar? I don’t know what laws if any will result from this landmark MySpace-related court case, so I’m laying down the mom-law. We’re reminded from this case that things happen when we’re not looking. So I’m busting out the Visine and keeping both eyes as wide as I possibly can. 

Besides, I seriously doubt that one day I’ll look back and regret that I didn’t let my child MySpace more often. I doubt I’ll be sad we took those walks and had those talks during the time that my daughter could have been MySpace-ing with Pete from Toledo who loves Paramore and Twilight. I’ll take the heat for being “mean mom” cyber patrol. It’s okay—I hear all the cool parents are doing it.   

According to the U.S. Department of Education, National Center for Education statistics[1], 99% of all students had access to computers in public schools in 2002.  In 2003, the U.S. Census on Internet Access and Computing[2], 55% of American homes contained Web-connected computers. That number was triple of those utilizing Web-connected computers in homes in 1997, and could theoretically be in the 75-80% range or greater at this point. Of course, the very process of collecting data is tedious and the information is immediately outdated, but it is a fair to assume that most adults and nearly all students have access to the Internet at some point in the day. It is also a fair assumption that most Internet users have been victims of either cyber-harassment or cyber-bullying. The latter, cyber-bullying, is specifically aimed at young computer users and is the new buzzword online as well as in schools. Preventing cyber-bullying has becoming a hot topic amongst school administration, parents, and students everywhere. 

What is cyber-bullying? It’s exactly what it sounds like. It is when a child, pre-teen or teenager is targeted by another, usually repeatedly, through the use of technology (primarily the Internet) with the malicious intent to humiliate, harass or otherwise torment that individual. And with more teens using the Internet to access sites like MySpace, Facebook and other socially oriented community sites, it’s likely that the problem of cyber-bullying isn’t going anywhere soon.  

Be there no mistake–cyber-bullying and harassment is a crime, although laws regarding dealing with such offenses vary from state to state. Often times, repercussion happens in the form of lawsuits. As for schools, policies are changing to include ramifications for reported cyber offenses.  

This is a good day for The Scarlet Foundation to open dialogue about a problem that is under-reported and often ignored. Amongst today’s headlines is the ongoing saga of a trial that getting set to take place concerning one of the best publicized examples of cyber-bullying[3]. Federal prosecutors are selecting jurors to weigh in on a case against a Missouri woman who, in 2006, allegedly “preyed on the psyche of a 13-year-old girl” ultimately resulting in suicide. The woman, Lori Drew, is said to have posed as a 16-year-old boy who flirted with 13-year-old Megan Meier and then cruelly taunted her, going so far as to say “the world would be a better place without you.” Megan’s mother found her daughter dead later that day. This particular exchange took place on MySpace, a widely-used social network. Drew faces 20 years if convicted of one count of conspiracy and three counts of accessing protected computers without authorization. Obviously, this is a worst case scenario of cyber-bullying.

The Scarlet Foundation was created with the idea in mind that more eyes on Internet sites, boards, Spaces and other cyber nooks and crannies can help to curb taunting, cruel and unusual remarks and other inappropriate cyber activity that may bring harm to other users. The Scarlet Foundation seal will appear on sites desiring to send the message to its users that it has a no-tolerance policy against cyber-bullying or other forms of online harassment.  

What can you do about cyber harassment and cyber-bullying? Refrain from posting anything inflammatory on any site. Google yourself, your name and your email address–what do you find? Consider your words to be footprints leading back to your doorstep and never commit a remark to cyberspace that you can’t stand by. Take as much responsibility for your words as if they were coming from your own lips while you are looking the receiver in the eye. Set an example of young users in your household and train users to police their own footsteps as well. Instructing young people to ”sleep on it” or count to 20 can sometimes alleviate some of the anger that inspires immediate and sometimes detrimental online posts. Should your child be targeted by online bullying, there are various forms of online resources where such posts can be reported anonymously. Should your child know his or her bully, inform school authorities immediately about the derogatory Intenet attack. Keep the lines of communication open between you and your child regarding the Internet so that he or she will feel comfortable reporting such issues with you. A way of doing this would be to engage in an ongoing email dialogue with your child–children sometimes feel more comfortable expressing their concerns with their parents via the ”safety shield” of an IM icon or email letter. Also, being aware of the sites that your child is frequenting, having an adult in the room while your child is online, and speaking frankly with your child about their online activity are all ways to reduce the occurrences of cyber-bullying.   

Meanwhile, The Scarlet Foundation will be doing our part, patrolling the Internet to make is a safer place to work, socialize and do business. See you online!

Sources:

[1] http://nces.ed.gov/pubs2000/2000090.pdf

[2] http://maisonbisson.com/blog/post/11088/us-census-on-internet-access-and-computing/

[3] http://news.aol.com/article/woman-goes-on-trial-in-myspace-hoax/254725